Global warming

Chelsea tractor by psheil (Peter Sheil)

Got a car, big and safe, four-by-four;
Drive your kids to their school, door-to-door.
Global warming's no factor
For your Chelsea tractor—
You take and consume, more and more.

The term Chelsea tractor is used, often disapprovingly, to describe large, four-by-four cars with off-road capabilities being used in an urban environment for such "adventurous" activities as taking the children to school and visiting the local supermarket. The cars are named after the affluent district of London where a large number of such vehicles may be observed.

☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉

atmosphere by Robert Holland (Robert Holland)

"Global warming, what's that? Just say no!
It is something I don't need to know."
Bushies say, "Have no fear,
A cure will appear.
Let the atmosphere go with the flow."

"Mounting scientific evidence that human activity is causing global temperatures to rise coupled with a growing public alarm — fueled by former Vice President Gore's climate change documentary, 'Inconvenient Truth,' this summer — has forced lawmakers to take up the issue." ("Global warming fear lights fire under Congress", San Francisco Chronicle, September 23, 2006.) "Even on Capitol Hill, we have reached the tipping point," said Philip Clap, the president of the National Environmental Trust. "George Bush's 'just say no' policy on global warming is political history."

See bailout and Bush

☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉

cataclysmically by Chris Doyle (Chris Doyle)

Global warming may lower the boom,
Leaving humans enshrouded in gloom.
Will our hubris and sin
Send the earth in a spin—
Cataclysmically plunging toward doom?

☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉

bail out, bail by Robert Holland (Robert Holland)

Global warming is coming, no doubt.
But fixes are wasteful. Why pout?
The oceans may rise,
But in time, I surmise,
A savior will bail us all out.

In June 2006, Germany's Chancellor presided over the opening of "the world's first carbon-free [power] plant fueled by coal", but it's only a demonstration model. "In the United States, you defer all investments, because in the future maybe you have the perfect solution," said a government official under the previous German Chancellor. "I would prefer a solution that improves the situation now." ("Europe's Green Image Clashes With Reliance on Coal", New York Times, June 20, 2006.)

☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉

antediluvian by Roger Dunn (Roger Dunn)

I have antediluvian dreams
Where a hull built with gopherwood beams
Is laid down for a flood:
Global warming? I should
Buy a ticket from Noah, it seems.

☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉

break up by Mad Kane (Madeleine Begun Kane)

An ice shelf breaks up in the ocean.
Global warming's far more than a notion
Dreamed up by Al Gore,
Though some wish to ignore
All the changes that greed's set in motion.

According to polar researchers, ice shelves get weaker as the temperature rises. This accounts for the recent collapse (reported in late 2006) of a Canadian ice shelf the size of 11,000 football fields.

☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉

Big Oil by Robert Holland (Robert Holland)

To Barton, it's just a green trick:
Global warming, the "Truth" in Gore's flick.
Big Oil gets a laugh
Watching Gore climb a graph,
Now famous as Al's hockey stick.

A cover story in Business Week magazine, ("Why You Should Worry About Big Oil?", May 15, 2006) says "Big Oil, that clutch of oil and gas giants in the U.S. and Europe, has big problems ... These companies, moreover, enjoy huge political clout in their home countries, have spotty environmental records, and staunchly defend outrageous prices at the gasoline pump. Why worry about them?" Why worry about them, indeed.

An independent review of the startling graph shown in Al Gore's movie "An Inconvenient Truth" has validated the science behind the graph. Texas Republican Joe Barton, at that time the chair of the House Energy Committee, ignited a firestorm amongst scientists in June 2005 when he asked the creators of the graph (part of a 1998 global warming study) "for a detailed accounting of their government and private funding, data, and methods" spanning their entire careers. A Democrat member of Mr. Barton's Committee asked Mr. Barton to withdraw his requests, saying "Some might interpret them as an attempt to bully and harass climate experts who have reached conclusions with which you disagree", the BBC reported on July 18, 2005. An independent review of the study was ordered.

Barton's tactics were also condemned in an editorial in the Washington Post ("Hunting Witches", July 23, 2005), which concluded: "The only conceivable purpose of these letters is harassment. This bizarre episode deserves much wider condemnation from congressional leaders."

The now famous graph is known as "the global temperature hockey stick" because its tail end, showing temperature increases over the past 100 years, rises sharply like the blade of a hockey stick. ("National panel supports '98 global warming evidence", Boston Globe, June 23, 2006) "The hockey stick is alive and well," said Raymond Bradley, one of the original study authors.

☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉

carbonaceous by speedysnail (Rory Ewins)

Global warming, you say? Goodness gracious!
That really is rather vexatious.
From smoke when we burn
Off the trees? Live and learn...
Who knew forests were so carbonaceous?

☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉

carbon dioxide by Dottie (Anne Clements)

We know carbon dioxide's produced
When the power of oil is unloosed.
Now it's time we must learn
That for each ton we burn,
Global warming is given a boost.

☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉

calve by Chris Doyle (Chris Doyle)

When an iceberg is calved, it breaks free
From a glacier and falls in the sea.
Global warming is here,
And with each passing year,
Polar ice caps produce more debris.

☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉

Alaska by Meg Beagle

It's not cold in Alaska, not storming.
It's to world climate patterns conforming.
The permafrost's melting,
And temps are sunbelting,
As we all watch our doom—global warming.

Well, a lot of us watch it. Some of us don't.

☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉

arctically by Ulfras (Ulfras)

Global warming could generate heat
That would cause polar ice to retreat.
If the permafrost goes,
Words like icebergs and floes
Would, like arctically, be obsolete.

(AR-tik-lee)

☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉ ☉

autotrophy by Chris Doyle (Chris Doyle)

With autotrophy, everything's cool.
All that carbon dioxide is fuel!
As your Prez, I must say
Global warming's okay,
And that Democrat Kyoto's a fool.

(aw-TAH-truh-fee)